Saturday, January 21, 2006

Basketball and Life

I am coaching basketball and this has been a rough season. We started off by getting our butts wiped across the court in the first 3 games, tied up the 4th and lost in OT, won the 5th, won the 6th, and lost the 7th by 2 points. For the first time ever in my coaching carreer of any get sport I am hoping the parents don't show up! Usually I am praying that the parents will pay attention to their children and support them, this year the parents and family who do come sit behind me and cuss me out because they don't like the decisions I make. Oh well, at least they are there watching their kids and I need to get a thicker skin!
The decision on the next 10 years of my life should be made this week- I should find out where I am going and then we can figure out what we are going to do and how we are going to do it. I am both nervous and excited! We set up a timeline a few weeks ago and we are now planning to leave in the summer of '07. Knowing that is helpful but it was also a hard realization that I really am going to be single- most likely for the next 10 years or for the rest of my life. I think I am OK with it but I am mourning what I have always wanted in my life that I will not have. I want God's best and I am confident that He will provide the emotional support that I need to choose His will and not my own. It is a daily struggle but the fact that there isn't anyone interested in me or that I am interested in makes the whole struggle ridiculous!
I have been hanging out with friends from work- all married and somehow they get all the flirtation, all the propositions, all the suggestive emails-- I am glad that I don't have to deal with it to be honest but I wonder what marriage is if they all seem to think that as long as nothing happens it is ok to keep up the appearances that something might. Is that honoring to the spouse even if they don't know?? I have to say that if I was married I wouldn't want my husband giving the impression that he might cheat on me to people who would want him to. Hmm-- am I just naive- maybe, am I just being judgmental-- maybe.
Off to do other things this weekend--

1 comment:

Amy said...

Have you ever thought that maybe God is preparing this minute a man for you in the country you'll be living? Keep your heart and mind open! Love you.